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.In the lamplight, his black hair, still damp from his shower, glistened like polished jet, falling in lazy waves over his high forehead.Looking up at his burnished face, Mandy decided she’d never seen a handsomer countenance, all hard planes and sharp angles, his brows arching like thick black wings over his coffee brown eyes.“We have a little ground to cover before we take this any further,” he told her.“I’m crazy, Stetson-over-boot-heels in love with you, Mandy Pajeck.The last time I told you that, you tried to feed me a line of bullshit about caring for me as a friend.” He gently pushed an errant lock of hair from her cheek.“There was a time when I would have settled for friendship—or maybe only a come-on smile.But not with you.You’re special to me.I don’t want to dirty that up with meaningless sex.Are you following me?”Mandy’s heart caught.Zach was the kind of man who’d want the whole nine yards if he loved a woman—commitment, marriage, and a family.She could love him with all her heart, but she could never marry him.“I’m following.”He acknowledged her response with a kiss on the end of her nose.“Have I ever told you that I think your nose is sexy as hell, and that I love your eyes?”Mandy smiled slightly and shook her head.“Well, I’m telling you now.I love everything about you.I won’t push you right now for marriage.I know the very thought sends you over the edge.But can you at least give me a long-term promise of commitment with the word love tossed in somewhere? I need this to be special.If you can’t give me that, I’ve got an unopened bottle of Jack Daniel’s downstairs, and I’ll talk your ears off all night, but I won’t make love to you.”Mandy’s throat went tight.“I’m not sure what love feels like, Zach.I mean, I love Luke, no question, but my feelings for you are so different.”“Tell me about them.”Mandy groped for words, swallowed hard, and curled her hand over his upper arm, trailing fingertips over the bulge of his biceps.“Well, I.I think about you all the time, and I try to remember how you looked and what you said.I miss you when we’re not together.When I’m upset, I feel like I can’t breathe unless you’re with me.I need to hear your voice, and I want you close, and I want to feel your hand holding mine.But mostly I want your arms around me.” She gulped and stared at him.“It scares me, needing someone.For so long I never did.Is that love? It’s nothing like what I feel for Luke.He needs me, not the other way around.Is needing someone.well, is that love?”His firm mouth tipped into a crooked grin.“It’s definitely part of it.I feel the same way, needing to be with you.When I’m not, it feels like the sun went behind a cloud.”“Me, too,” she whispered.“And when we talk on the phone, it’s hard to hang up because then I won’t be able to hear your voice.” A hundred different feelings welled within Mandy at that moment, and she had words to describe none of them.“You make my world seem right.When you’re close to me, I know everything is going to be okay.”He lightly dragged his thumb over her lower lip.“Love is only a word.It’s the feelings that count, not the sounds we utter to describe them.”“So have I passed your test?”He chuckled and bent to nip lightly at her chin.“It wasn’t really a test, but yes, if you feel that way about me, I’ll accept that as love with a capital L.”Mandy’s body went limp.She’d been so afraid he might leave her, and right then, she felt as if she might fall apart if he did.“Last chance,” he whispered.“We don’t have to do this.With you, my willpower sucks, but I’m pretty sure I can just hold you until you fall asleep.”Mandy wanted more than that.She wanted to melt and be absorbed through the pores of his skin.She wanted—no, needed—to feel him all around her and all through her.Just being near him made her body ache and feel hot inside.She sensed that he had the power to make her forget the sight of her mother’s corroded ring and finger bone lying in the dirt.But it was more than that
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